hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
