Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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