I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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