I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
