R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize