I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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