well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
