If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
