so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
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