Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
