Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
