youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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