found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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