shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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