Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
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