I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
