Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Randomize
