You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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