sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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