I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
