Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Randomize
