She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
The struggles of a small town man whore
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize