i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Randomize