Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
pray to the hookup gods
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
