I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
