i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
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