as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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