Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
