I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
My dick has a subreddit
BRING THE BAGELS
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
