you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
