You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I want to fling myself into the sun
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
