dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
