I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
