Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
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