My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
