Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
