Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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