she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize