is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
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