these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
