Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Still dying that you shit outside
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
