Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
