Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
