What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
