This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
