ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Randomize
