Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
