We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
