Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
