I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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